Super Awesome Edward Love Story
by gotxbraisn
Summary: Edward and his super awesome love adventures. Ommm yea char death and yaoi and sometimes yuri
1. Edward Loves Bella

Bella sat down quietly as she sat and stared without breathing across the room at edward. "He's so amazing i want to be with him forever and ever and then marry him and be with him longer" she said allowed. Her frends was like "stfu your so in love with him just go ask him out" and bell was like "but he will hit me and beat me and suck on my pinky until i see his teeth in my butthole" "How many teeth in your butt" "30" then she sighed and got up. "I'm gonna go ask him" then she got up and go aksed him "will you marry me edward ullen" "no i'm too dnagerous b ut you smell so good aaaaaannnnnnndnddddddndd i will eat you but you will die if i have sex wit you" "i don't care about that i just want to be with you fever eddikins!" eddward got up and left then came back and left again and bella was like "no" and went after him but then he came back and then he was like "omg okay i will marry you" and then they were married and started to had sex but then bella died because edward did his pelvic thrust too hard.

the end.

Hello everyones!OMG HI this is my first story i EVAR wrote i hope thye are to in characatasr cuz i treid really hard at this so plees rate and review!

Auther: I DON'T OWN TWILIGHT! IF I DID THEN EDWARD AND JACOB WOULD SO HAVE WILD BUTT SEX ALL THE TIME!  
EdWord: EW THAT'S GROSS I DON'T LIKE BUTT SEX Auther: In my world you do =] 


	2. Edward Loves Jacob

afterwards edward wuz like oh shit fuck bitch titties what did i do! she's dead!111!1!11!11one!11!" but he kept going cuz the body was still warm and then he orgasmed and stuff was everywhere (AN: ew not his stuff, her bloody stuff perverts!) and then he was like "" and then jacob heard and was like "stfu mate or i will transformerz and roll out all over you." Suddenly edward looked at jacob like really loooooked at him and he relized he mowch he loved the gorgoues intian boy and then he pounced and they started kissing and making out while they kissed. "Jacob was like we shouldn't be doing this but i want to" said edward to jacob to jacob "no it's wrong your wife just died" he said while wipin some of bella's blood of his fingers and licking it "mmmmmmm blueberry" "she testes as good as she smelled" and then they aaughed and luaghed and lagghed and lagged and lasguhasdf until the saw the it was time to go. so they left holding hands. then they ran into Jasper who was edward left and kissed jacob goodbye and then left and they said "we'll meet again and do the sexy fun time" and jacob wuz like "oh yes that sounds like fun" then edward left for good but jacob was smarter than dumbass bella and didn't give an apeshit cuz he didn't want someone creeping on him while he slept.

the end.

hello agan to all my fans! srry i took so long 2 rite a new story i was buys but here you go the second part of my super awesome edward luv stry

warning this has sum sexy man lovin!

I do not own twilit becauxe i idn't rite it SMeyer rote it so go complain to here that everyune in he stry is strate 


	3. Charlie Loves Edward

Edward lefted Jakub b4 he gott a chane to hurt him abeucse dey wer so in luv and edword wanted 2 not hurt his lovely so he decided teh best way to nt do dat wuz to killz himself. so he went over to a cliff and starred down and saw 4 a secund his ex wives face and a sad fell out and dripped to the ground because he was sad that he had killed his wifey during there most intimiate moment. his eyes close because he was in his normal people sneakers and he fell forward and fell and all of a sudden charlie grabbed him an pulled him up. "you evil basterd how dare you kill my daughtre!" he scream at edward. edward sad and lowered head in shame. "I just wanted sexy fun time with her cuz i loved her so much..." he said morselly. "but then she died." he said morselly. "GGGRRAAH! I AM RAGE AT YOU!" Chralie scream shouted. "YOU WANTED SEXY FUN TIME! I SHOW IT TO YOU NOW STRIP DOWN BITCH!" Chrlie yelle and edwrad whimper and nodded. "If it help ease yur pain and mine of loosing a loved one, i will do it." he said like a nobeel prince carved out of stone. his clothes came up and charlie kicked them off the edge of cliff and edward blushed. "wut r u going to do to me chrlie?" he asked as he watche dcharlie strip himself too. "RRAAWWR I'M GONNA RAPE YOU!" and then he raeped edword and edward wuz like "ugh no stop it! it hurts! please make it stop!" and chralie waz liek "UNF UNF UNF UNFUNF UNF UNFUNFUNFUNFUNF UNF" and then charlie finished and edword lay on the groun czu he was being beten and was bloooody "tis isn't hjappneing" he said morselly and closed his eyes and passeded out. 138 dayz later he woke up and had forgotten about it and whent into town butt naked and sparkled and cuz he was such an adonis he made everyone in the city go into a 3 day coma induced byu his sexiness

the end.

* * *

^finly figgerd out how 2 do these things! ^o^

a was litte hesitating to rite about rape cuz i luv edword so much!11!1! it was hrd 2 rite poor eddikins! CUM HERE  
BBY I WILL PROTECT YOU! *holds eddikins* it's okay... your girlfriend's here... don't worry you can just kill the bastard  
that raped you later!

Also I dod nut own twilight cuz i6t oned by sexany meyer woops i mean steaphaani ;)

If you want to see an hero edward pairing with anyone just ask! I'll even do incest! Aand any ideas 4 yuri scene i have  
always been a bit bicurious so i was planning on writing one just 4 fun who would you wnat it 2 b?


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